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December 22nd 2006 | 18:10 | Uncategorized
Well, I’m back with the parents for a nice relaxed christmas.  I am currently looking at all the presents stacked under the tree, and am resisting the urge to tear all the wrapping off them with my teeth like an overactive beagle.
Well, earlier in the year I promised you an announcement of some magnitude. If you have waited patiently, well bless you. It’s more likely you’ve forgotten though. So here it is: (and if this doesn’t get me some bloody comments then I’m giving up)
I’m going to be a dad.
Yes me, the least responsible, least fiscally aware 27-year-old in history must now sort my life out because soon it wont just be me anymore. It looks as though it’s going to be a girl, so any baby shower-esque gifts in pink or neutral colours can be sent to the usual address! Words can’t describe what a wierd few months these have been for me, and I can’t comprehend just what a strange year is going to be ahead for me.
In the meantime though, Merry Christmas to all of you, and I hope Santa brings you many multicoloured and pretty pretty things.
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4 Comments
Jonic
December 23rd 2006 | 02:26
Does it count if I comment, even though you know that I have known the news for a couple of months now?
I guess you said “comments”, so you just need one more to make it a plural… Don’t give up yet Paul! Don’t give up! Like Aerosmith in that game “if you’re watching this then they’ve taken over”…
What an utter stack of shit…
I didn’t know you were having a girl… Further congrats man… Are we still having a boozey do after Festivus?
Jonic
December 23rd 2006 | 17:40
Oh dear… Did I comment while I was pissed again?
The Aerosmith thing might not have made much sense. I was refering to a game called “Revolution X”, which sees you taking on an oppressive government that has captured Aerosmith and wants to, wait for it, ban music.
No I’m not kidding.
Paul
December 24th 2006 | 11:40
I do have a vague recollection of it being in the arcades actually, didn’t you have to collect musical notes and throw them at bad guys or something? I did play it, mainly because Aerosmith rule.
Jonic
December 25th 2006 | 04:49
You shut your fucking mouth… If you had have played that game you would not be so ready to tell me that “Aerosmith rule”…
I would sooner take a bradawl to my tearducts than play that game again… It’s about as much fun as having your shins stamped on by André the Giant.
Oh wait, he’s dead…
Ok…
It’s about as much fun as having a man ‘reanimate’ the cadaver of André the Giant with a series of pulleys, ropes and levers, so that this beastly automaton may stamp on your shins…
Actually, that does sound like fun…
Put me down for both shins…
In the meantime you can google “revolution x” and recalibrate your idea of all that is good in this world…
Then you can call me and apologise for ever saying that Aerosmith could ever do anything other than “suck ass”…
Six words for you Paul, one of which isn’t even a fucking word: “I don’t wanna miss a thing”.
Now tell me Aerosmith rule…
Come on!
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